Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
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