so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize