No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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