We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize