She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize