is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
