I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
