dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
