But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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