I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
