the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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