My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Life is so much better after having sex.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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