my vag is so smooth its legendary
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Randomize
