"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize