I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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