lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
