Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I'm always down for nudity.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
