apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
