Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize
