I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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