She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
