Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
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