I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
