Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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