he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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