Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize
