You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
