i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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