So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize