I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
