Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
