Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
It was a blind-side dick pic.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
