I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
