I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I need moral support for this bender
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
