I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Randomize
