I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize