Screwed.edu
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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