Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
whose ass print is on the piano?
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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