its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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