Its about making memories worth repressing
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize