I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Randomize
