I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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