that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Randomize
