Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
she looked like the before picture.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
