YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
well you can't waste a boner
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
