Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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