Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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