thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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