My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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