He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
